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The Onion Movie

Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

6.1

2008Comedy80 minPlay

HD5

Maximum Conviction

When former black ops operative Cross and his partner Manning are assigned to decommission an old prison, they must oversee the arrival of two mysterious female prisoners. Before long, an elite force of mercenaries assault the prison in search of the new arrivals. As the true identities of the women are revealed, Cross realizes he's caught in the middle of something far bigger than he had imagined.

2012Action97 minPlay

HD4.6

Kill Switch

A troubled detective travels to Memphis in order to track down a pair of serial killers.

4.6

2008Action92 minPlay

HD4.5

Into the Sun

After the assassination of Tokyo's Governor by Yakuza members, the CIA bureau chief for Tokyo puts out a call to an agent that had been raised in Japan and trained by ex-Yakuza. Using his former ties, he quickly determines that a war is brewing between old-guard Yakuza members and a young, crazed leader with ties to the Chinese Tong.

4.5

2005Action97 minPlay

HD5.2

On Deadly Ground

Forrest Taft is an environmental agent who works for the Aegis Oil Company in Alaska. Aegis Oil's corrupt CEO is the kind of person who doesn't care whether or not oil spills into the ocean or onto the land—just as long as it's making money for him.

5.2

1994Action101 minPlay

HD5.9

Hard to Kill

Mason Storm, a 'go it alone' cop, is gunned down at home. The intruders kill his wife, and think they've killed both Mason and his son too. Mason is secretly taken to a hospital where he spends several years in a coma. His son meanwhile is growing up thinking his father is dead. When Mason wakes up, everyone is in danger - himself, his son, his best friend, his nurse - but most of all those who arranged for his death

5.9

1990Action95 minPlay

4.6

End of a Gun

A mall security guard—and former federal agent—crosses paths with a drug kingpin's enforcer after the guard saves a woman from danger.

4.6

2016Action87 minPlay

HD4.5

Out of Reach

Vietnam veteran Billy Ray Lancing, a former CSA agent who now works on a wildlife refuge in Northern Alaska, has been exchanging letters in a pen-pal relationship with Irina Morawska, a 13-year-old orphaned girl in Poland that he's helping out financially. When the letters suddenly stop coming, Billy heads to Poland to figure out why -- only to discover that the orphanage that Irina was staying in, which is financed by honest -- and unsuspecting -- good-intentioned Samaritans, is a cover ...

4.5

2004Action85 minPlay

HD5.8

Under Siege 2: Dark Territory

A passenger train has been hijacked by an electronics expert and turned into an untraceable command center for a weapons satellite. He has planned to blow up Washington DC and only one man can stop him, former Navy SEAL Casey Ryback.

5.8

1995Action99 minPlay